To live in whoville; how do we get back...

I begun this writting several years ago the first christmas season after my seperation from my wife. I found it and thought that it is still very appropriate and needed to be completed. I hope you enjoy it. I have made a few observations that I have added to the text.


To live in Whoville…

Most remember Whoville and the Grinch that stole Christmas. But beyond the idea that this small town with its strong community spirit changed the hardened Grinch's heart who lives in Whoville?

You know I live actually grew up in a small town called Everson Washington. Everson even now 35 years later has a population that was 2,035 at the 2000 census. It was under a thousand when I was growing up like 700 or so. My dad was a local farmer and had coffee with the other farmers each morning to discuss the seasons and the town politics. I am sure that my Dad probably knew half of everyone that lived in Everson and he really was an isolationist. The town I went to school Lynden Washington had about 2000, and now has 9,020. Both of these towns qualify for Whoville.

So I am quite aware of small town living as it represents even to this day 50% or more of my total life. I spent my life working on a farm, and going to church. I went to a private school for most of my life and never was exposed to big city living till I moved to Dallas at 34. Most do not believe after they get to know me that I was born and raised on a small farm. I don't look like a farm boy anymore. I guess I have donned the fast talking city slicker role and have the trappings that are fitting of a Houstonian. Even though I live in the town of Kemah which still only has 2,330 people. In reality I still live in Whoville.

I hope though that even though I have a lifestyle that corresponds to a metropolis of 8+ million people that my concern and true beliefs about people show my upbringing. I try to live my life so that people can see that I value everyone and treat them with respect. I try to add value to a conversation, I try to teach and instruct in areas that I have experience. I give of myself hoping to bring a benefit to those that I touch. I have gone through many phases in my life from Learner to Conquerer to now a new phase in my life that I will call Teacher.

Now only a couple of years later people look at my aging apearance and think that I am a hardened corporate pirate, when in fact I am the same sensitive individual that has to look away at rough comments that hurt my feelings. People see me at work and think, "I would never want to be on the other side of the table from him." When really I sit around watching my phone for a text from someone special and plan what the next weekends surprise is for my girl. Now I live in Kemah Texas a town of 2,330 right next to the 4th largest city in the country Houston Texas. Kemah is a bay town, typical of any small maritime town. Everything seems to revolve around tradition and the water and the economy and lore that it provides.

Small towns typically have a strong sense of community as people are more able to keep up with what is going on. The politics and community is much simpler than the complex workings of a large city. When the cities get larger it takes more time to keep up with their inner workings and therefore start to take away from friends and family. At some point we become completely displaced and no longer can maintain knowledge of what is going on and why. Here in Kemah everyone still remembers the ground breaking of the bank etc.

I still live on my boat some 4 years later and still keep to myself so even in a town of 2,330 people noone knows me. I do like to buy locally or from a nearby town as you get the feeling that someone actually cares. You get the sense that you are helping someone retire, or send their kids away to college to have a good shot at life. In Houston buyers act like people are just trying to take advantage of them and in many cases if they had the chance they would do just the same.

I work in Houston a lot and it always surprises me how few people buy from honest value bringing companies. They would rather save a penny then do business with an honorable company. Or another way to say it is when you are talking with them and trying to build value in your solution other than the hard and tangible items they just do not care. In fact you really get the sense that they are all anarchists as they do not support or show any concern for the community at all. I guess I miss the small town hey Bob you were $10 more but I'll buy from you because I know that Jimmy is playing football at TU this year and you are going to need the extra money. People were not adverse to allowing someone to make an honest profit on them. Instead they all want to cut someone out of a commission and to figure out how to get it the cheapest they can? Is that really what is important?

Whatever happened to those days of community? If someone lost a job that family would not go hungry, if a child had needs they would not go unanswered. At what point did we turn so far inward that we have forgotten our heritage? I would guess that most people do live outside of the large metropolises. It is my guess also that most do remember giving a damn about other people, so what drove us away from caring?

What made us so greedy that all we care about is making a fast buck or 2 more than we really deserve? What makes us think that we deserve whatever we can choke out of people? What is our entitlement? What commission do we carry that makes us privateers over just plain ruthless pirates?

You have seen me write about it before but at times of the year like this I get more disgusted with what I see than other times of the year. From late winter to early fall I race every other weekend and live on a 34 foot race boat with 10 other people that our lives and success depend on each other. Even though we have moments where we would like to kill each other and even yell at one another we would fight to the death if something were to happen to one of us. During the winter months I do not have this influence and typically focus more on work. With the holidays this makes these months short and the work load is much greater as many people are not interested in purchasing large items at work they are more interested in the things they need to buy for their family.

So by the time Thanksgiving comes around I am pretty full of Houston and work. I have had 4 or 5 people stab me in the back and maybe a few in the chest while looking at me. At the Thanksgiving table sit and reflect on my life and my family. Most of them having past away it is really more of a memorial day than a day of festivities. Memorial Day of course is one of the most important race weekends during the year so you can be assured that I do not slow down to visit those that have gone before us on that weekend. Thanksgiving on the other hand is the day that I typically reflect. I remember all of the things that have brought me to here; the blessings, the miracles everything that has transpired over the last year that I should give thanks for.

Growing up Thanksgiving was a time when we didn't involve friends. It was strictly immediate family. Now with a sister in Tulsa and a Dad in Bend I really don't have any parts of that anymore. During my marriage I was part of another family and did engage with them over Thanksgiving. I had earned the right to be family and worked hard to provide. I always was involved in each of their lives as we had opportunity to do so and enjoyed the time with them. They had a very large immediate family and holidays were filled with nieces and nephews, lots of food and laughter. Oh how I long to have that sense of true family again.

Anymore I try to stick to myself during such times and remember what I am trying to accomplish with the years that I have left. I reflect on the ideas of my youth and the wisdom that I have painfully purchased over the years. I think back on my mother and how she would have supported me in my endeavors and my brother how he would have been such a great success had he lived past 16. I look at the few survivors of our family and do not see the accomplishments that I would have liked to. I see more battle scars and survival.

I HAVE enjoyed Houston because of the economy and the size of the metropolis gives it tolerance for new ideas. I have paid the ultimate price in this new transition; even with a good job and strong economy I am at risk of losing someone that I love and had hoped to spend my life with.

In large cities people do not get involved with your life and therefore are more tolerant of ideas that are not their own. Other the other hand they are so far removed that they would rather kick you into the street in front of a moving bus than look at you. I guess there is no happy medium. If the city is small enough to get to know you then they feel obligated to judge you.

So where does that leave the Pirate of Galveston Bay in the holiday season? Living hard and fast has got moved me forward in my career but left me alone. My choices have pushed out those whom I love and left me alone. Where will I be Christmas? Sitting on my boat with a glass of rum looking across the Bay in search of wind.

So when did we turn our backs on our community; when did we get so busy that we don't time for those around us?

I do believe in diversity! I do believe in tolerance for others ideas, even when they do not suit me. I wish we could bring Whooville to Houston and Dallas. Have you ever wished that on a place? How can we get more involved with our community? Is it just community service? Is it talking to and getting to know your immediate neighbors? What about school, church, the grocery store? What about the guy driving the BMW next to you on your way to work? Oh no not that prick, he cut me off. To hell with him! Is that what we are left with? Seeing if we can get home from work without killing someone because they upset us? Is that how we were raised?

I think that most of us had parents that would be astounded and ashamed if they were to see our actions once we leave the house. I don't think they would condone us taking advantage of others just because we can, or they can afford it. And I hope that our parents didn't do that to others that we just didn't see. I hope that they really did care for their community and participate in the solution and not be a part of the problem. Every once in a while I am surprised at how someone genuinely goes out of their way to help someone just because it was the right thing to do.

As it is I live in Whoville and work in Houston. I try to keep one foot in hell and one in heaven. Walking the thin line between the two worlds is a dangerous place to be. I still have dreams of people doing right while all day watching people try to destroy each other. I now have developed dreams of having my own family since I can not have mine old one back. Even now in my 40's I feel unequiped for the painfull experiences that I endure. I must have missed the classes that tought how to survive? I don't remember "Screw them 101", or "Get them first 203" in my schools curriculum. Is it our teacher's faults as after parents they spend the next most amount of time with our children. Parents, Teachers, Pastors, Family, Friends who gave up?

I think I would give up the anonymity that I get from the large city to bring back a sense that we are working for a purpose. The connection that we had as children because everything did seem connected and that we were all interrelated somehow. I liked walking into the store and seeing someone that I know. I like it when they show concern for a sick relative or are excited about a new job my Dad got. It is amazing sometimes how close we really are when you look at it. I still run into old school friends in Dallas even though we are thousands of miles apart and 3 decades later. It truly is a small world so is it just in our minds? Did we turn off our consciences just so we could tolerate the things we do to people? Is in inherent in us not the size of town that we live in.

You can take the boy out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the boy. So where does that leave the new Pirate of Galveston Bay? Much older and close to losing his dream of ever connecting the dots of family, love community. What is it about those that we love that pushes them away or makes them give up? I have lived hard and fast, so now how do I get anyone to believe that I really can live idle and slow?

How do I get back to Whovillle?