OH Mountain How I Did I Get Here...

Here I stand alone upon a mountain top,
My trials and fears no one will ever know.
I have struggled beyond my wildest dreams,
The darkness like a river continued to flow.

My ignorance, my weaknesses and even my insecurities,
were what walked me down this path.
It was my lack of attention that brought this mountains wrath.
And now that the storm is over and the winds have died down,
I look out over this mountain top and cannot wear a frown.

For a brief moment I look out at the serene beauty of the valley below
In my mind I remember; but my fear I do not show.
For my emotions took me through a dark place, and my weaknesses I did pack.
Through life changing chasms and cliffs I did face.
My fears I did overcome; my weaknesses I did attack

I do not know how I got here, this mountain was not on the map!
This was not my destination, nor part of my plan.
This Mountain just showed up as a challenge to where I stand.
Nor friend nor enemy was this mountain was to me!
Just another chance to witness God’s grace that he wants me to see.

Many days I've traveled and now here I stand,
It is a beautiful place but not what I understood of God’s plan.
I know this is not my destination, so my journey is not over.
There are many miles to go through valleys of flowers and fields of clover.

The mountains are high and the valleys are low,
The crimson fields in front of me are where I must go
I speak to the mountain and I say why did you hide
The mountain spoke back in loud rumbling roar
Nor trick or surprise did I bring to you, with the eagles you did not soar,

Pride and ignorance is the undoing of us all
As you were climbing up my sides I awaited your fall.
Your strength and courage you surely did find
Now mastering your lessons will be the test of time!

For love and courage is not all that you need,
But a strong back, a strong will, and the desire to succeed.
Knowing what to do will not let you plead,
But your actions over time will show you how to lead.
So push on do not linger you must continue for what you seek.
I was not your goal, so let your travels take you afar.
A relationship drives your journey so keep your eyes on the stars.

The pain and anguish my heart swept away, as this mountain explained that I was not here to stay
So I took one last look from this very high peak,
After I caught my breathe I grabbed my flag to create a memorial,
It was not this mountain but a relationship that I did seek.

I plant it firmly in the rock and the mountains rich soil.
My soul is refreshed and I have forgotten my pain and toil.
As I place this flag in remembrance of my challenges, I look down into the new valley below.
All I see is her face, her smile and how our future will grow!
I love her and her son as if they were my very own.
My love is not in vain, and my commitment now in stone!
Upon the mountain top I stand firm with a chart in my hand,
My dreams are wide, and my visions are grand.
For it is a woman that I love and a family that I have made
That pushes me on to victory and to take on my fears.
It is her love that motivates me and dries up my tears.

look at my flag as it reaches out of the soil,
I remind myself of the things I did learn, of the things I did toil,
And one last time I linger and take one last look at my map
The mountain speaks to me yet again, "what are you doing now?"

I have learned a great lesson that I do not want to repeat.
I have plotted carefully so that I know where you are and have tracked my feet!
So that I do not make this mistake again or tempt life I do not dare.
Surviving a visit with an unseen mountain was not just a great feat,
But a life lesson that I will want to share.

I replied as I started to make my way down the other side…

Today She Believes In Your Dream!

Have you ever noticed that people seem to change their minds? Well in relationships they do as well. What is funny is that at any given moment we have some idea of what would like to accomplish or some set of goals written or otherwise that we would like to see happen over a period of time. When we are dating we are confronted with our dreams and goals as our new potential companions are very concerned with them.

As we build up our dreams and start to flesh them out we vocalize them over and over. Eventually someone grabs a hold of it and claims that it too is their dream. So like most people you two start to build a foundation for what will become a committed relationship and ultimately a new marriage. Hopefully as you go forward you two do not lose sight of what brought you together in the first place. Having a common dream and vision is important to long term success.

Interestingly enough people evolve or change quicker than many long term goals can be accomplished so what happens is as the two in the relationship change their individual goals chance as well. The overall goal isn’t being communicated or checked regularly to ensure that this new “couple” is on target for reaching their cooperative goals and dreams.

Over time the personal dreams gets stronger and stronger, as the overall dream gets weaker and weaker. No one checks to see if the milestones of the overall dream are being accomplished in a timely manner or that new obstacles have been brought out of the way to allow for success. More important is that not only has the communication of the overall dreams, steps to be taken and new obstacles that need to be overcome has stopped but there has never been any communication on the new personal dreams being built inside of the individuals in the couple.

Typically one will stay true to the dream but the other will be now secretly building their own dream with is never communicated so it is separate from the collective dream and therefore separate from the committed union. This rogue dream is not building steam where the collective dream has all but died. “It is for the lack of a dream that my people perish.” Now replacing the collective dream the secret dream now gains steam and momentum and overtakes the individual that has entertained its fancy.

Simply put this individual is now at odds with the collective dream either actively or passively but is now seeking to find ways to implement their own new dream. This divisiveness undermines the foundation or what the original union was based on. Now not having a foundation to stand on the union is in jeopardy.

Typically this will not come out in steps. It will boil and fester inside of the individual until it becomes overwhelming to the one that has lost the collective dream and either in the middle of a fight or disagreement or just as a stand along conversation confronts the other. This confrontation is typically a blame session where they are at fault for the new dream not getting accomplished. Sadly the one being accused of holding the one back was not even aware that there was a new dream at all!

Typically this is the first time this new desire has been brought up and being shocked and hurt the individual doesn’t know how to respond. In fact they typically respond poorly and things go downhill from there.   This quick degradation of the relationship typically ends with the destruction of the union. Ultimately the one that has come up with a new dream feels like they are alone and cannot ask the other to change.

Why? What would be the harm of open communication along the way? What could happen if when the seed was planted that it wasn’t communicated early on in its development? Is it because we do not communicate enough with the ones we love? Or is it more insidious that we are not listening? Is someone at fault or is it a draw?

Who originated the original collective dream? Was it one’s dream that was forced onto the other? Or was it truly a collective dream that both parties were bought into it and committed to see come to fruition? When a dream is “owned” by one there is a high likely hood that the union will fail. When the dream is truly co-operative there is still not guarantee that the union will hold together without constant communication and evaluation of what steps lie ahead and who has ownership of the individual components.

The problem with dreams is that most times there is a level of sacrifice that has to be made to execute the tasks tactically to allow for success of each successive level. Even the most well laid out plans will fail when the “owners” or those “tasked” are not 100% sold on the collective dream. Dreams are like living creatures their health is reflected by the collective mental health of those that are carrying out its tasks.

When the health of the dream suffers it is due to the lack of nurturing of those that are the carriers of the dream. Dream survival and success relies heavily on the participants keeping strong lines of communication open between all of the individuals. When some or all of the participants are silent about their fears and concerns the group or team becomes weakened.

So after the collective dream fades and the new secret dream takes over the heart and soul of the one harboring the new dream everything changes. Now things that were exciting and fun now become dreary and points of contention. Now what brought the group together will now ultimately destroy them.

I do not know the answers to the many questions that come from this phenomenon, but I have lived through its destruction. So as a leader of the dream one must champion every chance you get and maintain the excitement that is deposited in all of the participant’s hearts and soul this is the sign of a true leader! 

Best of luck to your dream and those that you get to believe in it!

How do you bring two lives together?

Well in our modern day society there are many things that can start a “union.” Also in the world of unions there are many types and levels of commitment? So what is it that drives us to desire someone else’s commitment to our dream? Is the success of that dream dependant on the quality of our vision? How about the detail by which we “flow chart” it? Is there a value to a written dream? Should all dreams be constantly be re-evaluated to ensure the longevity and validity? Can a dream started 10 years ago become null and void? Can a dream become non relevant?

At what intervals should we check ourselves and our dreams? Is there a formula for success? And whom should we share these dreams with in the first place? Should they be protected and hidden or should they be published and openly communicated? If we communicate our dreams to others the first thing we risk is rejection and ridicule. What is the benefit to communicating our dreams with others? Accountability, oversight, corrective criticism, and maybe if we are lucky help to get from a current step to the next.

So if we meet someone and you want to bring your lives together, the first thing you have to overcome is them being closed minded or not receptive to your current dream. So if that is true should you immediately change your dream to match their expectations? Should you look for the common ground and find a way to build your foundation upon the parts of the dream where there is agreement?

If you can successfully present your dream and get buy in what is your next step? Do we build business plans around our personal dreams just as if we were starting a company and were going to need a loan from the bank? Do you not think that an emotional loan will be requested at the time of your presentation? How much will this cost your potential partner? What are the risks? How much common ground do you have with individual that gives them the confidence to trust that what you are planning will work?

Fear, uncertainty and doubt will surely be your foes! Prepare to put the war paint on and draw your sword as you have just entered the coliseum! And just like the days of old, 2 go in and only 1 comes out! So in the world of dreams and unions does 1 side of the union have to lose for the originator to win? Well of course not, so that brings us back to how do you bring two lives together.

The collective dream is only possible when there is a symbiotic relationship place where both individuals need and respect the other. There already has to be an understanding before there can ever be a presentation or collective dream. Without harmony there can be no peace, and without peace there can be no honorable regime.

Army’s are run by dictators but relationships are run my patriarchs. These benevolent monarchies look simple but are nothing even close. Insecurity, Jealousy, fear, Distrust all come into play to erode the hierarchy that is put into place to ensure that the kingdom is run efficiently and honorably. Fear creates mistrust and mistrust creates divisiveness.  A house divided shall fall. There is no way for a union to succeed if both parties are not 100% committed to its success.

So then how do we bring two lives together? Well the first step is strong, frequent and open communication, after that  the two in question have to have a meeting of the minds; the minds have to be at peace. Time; time is the builder of trust and without trust no kingdom can be built. Trust is a funny asset as it can be constructed over time and in fact the best trust built is trust that has taken its time and has weathered a few storms yet is like peace of mind it can be wiped out in a second.

Communication

Peace

Time

Trust

Understanding: there has to be a clear understanding of what is bringing the two together in the first place. Random relationships with no purpose have no chance of standing against the storms that will soon be brought against it.
Plan; No kingdom can be built without a solid plan. The plan should have S.M.A.R.T. goals and should be measured and readjusted regularly to ensure progress is being made and that both parties take ownership of the successes and failures. Just as you would shoot an arrow at a target you must; aim, pull, shoot, readjust and start over till the bulls eye is hit or the game is won!
Execution; One must have impeccable execution of the plan. A plan without execution is nothing more than a pipe dream, thought of my the illusions of grandeur of fools.

Could anything be this easy?

Where do you live; and why does it matter?

You know it is interesting how we all share a common thread or two. And most of us at least generationally had a very similar upbringing. Yet as we get older we make choices that lead us down very different paths. Ultimately we end up quite unique. I grew up in a small farm town 15 miles south of the Canadian border. Roughly 30 minutes from Mount Baker and 30 minutes from Bellingham Bay, in a area that rarely ever got over 80 degrees in the summer and interestingly enough rarely had snow in the winter.

I grew up with my Dad building houses; he even found the time to build ours too. I spent a stint in Seattle and a stint living in the San Juan Islands all in "land homes." I even bought my own house at about 20 and again at 28 and then again at 34. The last time though was a bit different. I bought in a neighborhood that was far enough north of Dallas that I was able to get much more house than I could ever use. With all of the bedrooms that never ended up with furniture and an outside that always needed landscaping work. The house was about 10 years old and was a track home so everything was painted white. It seemed that the doors always needed to be re hung and my wife at the time wanted a new color scheme.

I fought hard to maintain a corporate sales job and come home and try to do the upkeep on the house myself. I like many Dallas-ites was a bit over my head. I bought my house when the scandal hit that everyone was getting mortgages when they really wouldn't qualify for what they had. I too had bought my house with a stated loan and because of my credit score and job didn't have to prove anything. Things were getting tough in my industry as the great consolidation began amongst competitors and things were getting harder and harder to make ends meet. My at the time wife was impervious to what was going on and stayed at home with our 2 puppies.

As life began to crush into me I started to question why I had such a large house when we never entertained or had children. I don't think she ever really questioned it we all were brought up with "you should own a home" mentality. I had dreams of sailing the oceans looking for adventure, exploring my world and writing about what I saw. She in the back of her mind really wanted to fill the house with children and be a soccer mom. Both were valid dreams they just wouldn't mesh.

When my X told me she wanted a divorce I was sad but understood. We had grown apart and couldn't believe in the others dream anymore. She didn't want to sail and I didn't want to settle down. I was too busy with my career, my racing and preparing myself for the day when I could push off land and never return. During that time I worked very hard but probably looked a bit scattered. It was so painful living in the house looking over at my soul mate that was leaving me that I moved myself onto my boat. I felt like at least I could be a bit more objective and the pain wouldn't be so intense. I think this really pushed her away as she couldn't understand that the only thing that kept me from climbing the mast and jumping off was the thought that soon I would wake up from my nightmare.

Well my nightmare never ended, we completed our divorce and low and behold I was still living on the boat. It was time to sell the house and move on. Even in the soft economy I was able to sell the house as I had bought it right with 10% down and 20% undervalued. So when it came time to sell I was able to get out clean. I had just started a new job and had negotiated the best salary and compensation package I had ever received. During the next 2 years I was able to get my finances back under control and get my self esteem back. Little did I know that while finding my way to the top of the performance ladder that I had pissed off a lot of people along the way?

All I was able to do at that point was to find the unemployment line. Meanwhile I have been maintaining my home on the water. People have a lot of strange ideas when they come out for the first time. It is always interesting to get their first reaction when they step down into my home. The boat fulfills all of the same things that a traditional "land home" offers; a place to sleep, change, entertain, cook, clean, rest, study. But mine also offers a place to challenge, and explore.

Now it has been about 4 years since the original day that I grabbed my clothes and migrated to the boat for shelter. Now it is just my home.

 

Pirate Mike

To Live and Love...

Life is like an ocean, it changes direction many times over its course. The ocean is a living and breathing body and the water is it's blood and the land masses it's arteries and veins. Love is like the current of the ocean it is not life but it is what pushes and drives us to get to our destination. The currents of the ocean take the water that brings life to every area of the planet. So to love brings to us all the nourishment that we need to be sustained. Without the currents the coral and reefs would die, and so the chain of life would wither with it. Without love as the driving passion of our being we too would die just as a baby without human touch.

The wind works with and sometimes against the currents to help with the spreading of the water over the planet. So to are our actions as they spread the truth of our heart to those that watch us. Our actions just like the wind sometimes go against what we profess. In the end we are known for our actions not our words, and just like the winds that cross the oceans they too are named for the direction that they go. Just as the wind stirs up the sea, so to our actions stir up the imaginings of the hearts around us. The winds do not carry the burden of responsibility on their own, nor do our actions as the responsibility lies in our hearts and minds.

The continents of the world create the road map for the oceans to follow like a mountain guide in a state park. The land masses create the environment that the water flows to and from. Just as our mind sets the stage that will allow our love to either leave or be locked up within our body and our soul. Bays, Channels and Seas all different formations of land that give each area of the world a distinct pathway for the current to push the water to each creature bringing life and life more abundantly. Just as the circumstances and events that mold our lives and give us the uniqueness of character to impact others and bring to them what they need.

Great sailing ships that brave the open oceans alone without fear, are much like the vessel of our heart that carries our love to the ends of the Earth. Just as the sailing ships can go against the wind, currents and tide, so to can our heart take us to places that we never dreamed. Even as the ships brave the weather and elements so to our hearts the fear of rejection and betrayal. Even as pirates are a feared encounter on the water so to is the event of true love feared by all those that have traveled those waters before.

For as we travel and give of ourselves, just as pirates someone we have loved has taken from us. But in the midst of the battle, swords drawn as the sound of steel pierces the distance, we must rejoice as our soul cries for freedom. Just as our heart has 2 sides that beat as one, so too is another soul that searches even as we speak. They too are a wandering spirit seeking a destiny that may not be apparent. And if ever you dare allow your ship to carry you across the currents of life, you will encounter that one that makes you whole. The one wanderer that brings nourishment to your spirit and sustenance to your soul is just around the bend.

Therefore strike out and fear not, as your heart speaks. Allow the current of your mind to take you away. Allow the body of your ship to take to the winds and allow yourself time to search far and near. Never allow the distance to bother you. Let the power of your love take you away from the tragedies that you have endured, and allow the newness of the day to take you to new places in your soul. Hide in those new places and you sail across the ocean. For one day you will come across another that completes you.

"The seas never stop, they come and go bringing to their inhabitants the substance of life, so is the tide of our life, people come and go and with them they bring the substance of life… don't ever give up on people, as you will have given up on your yourself…" – Pirate Mike (personal quote)